Category Archives: Devil's DVD Disappointment

Devil’s DVD Disappointment: Killer Elite

I’ve been wracking my brain for more accurate titles for Killer Elite…maybe Killer Not-So Elite, Killer Amateur, or Killer Movie Clichés perhaps. With that said, I assume you can tell where this review is going.

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Devil’s DVD Disappointment: Apollo 18

Based on overheard pre-show conversation, Hollywood has apparently left many younger-ish moviegoers with the impression that the ill-fated Apollo 13 was our last attempted mission to the moon. The Apollo program actually continued on for three more years and four more successful moon landings, missions which saw the first deployment of Lunar Rovers and the famous miles-long driving of at least two golf balls (Alan Shepard, Apollo 14). By 1973, however, with budget cuts, waning public interest in the space program, and increased attention being paid to the Skylab project, the planned Apollo missions 18 thru 20 were unceremoniously cancelled.

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Devil’s DVD Disappointment: Cowboys & Aliens

Take one part James Bond, one part Indiana Jones and mix in some cowboys and throw in some aliens with a side of Olivia Wilde sex appeal and you get the latest Jon Favreau directed movie.

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Devil’s DVD Disappointment: The Hangover Part II

In Hollywood the adage “if it’s not broke, don’t fix it” rings truer than ever. If audiences shelled out hundreds of millions of dollars for a product once, they’re very likely to do it again. And again. And, if not, there’s always the reboot. Why create when it is so much easier (and more lucrative) to re-create? Because you may end up with The Hangover Part II.

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Devil’s DVD Disappointment: Our Idiot Brother

Our Idiot Brother is more therapy than comedy; a cinematic trip to the psychiatrist – if the psychiatrist is a shaggy, magical hippie. In a deserved lead role, Paul Rudd is the idiot (and shrink) in question – a man dumb enough to sell drugs to an uniformed officer, yet smart enough to solve life’s petty problems in 90 minutes or less.

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Devil’s DVD Disappointment: Conan the Barbarian

Surprisingly entertaining in the face of one-dimensional characters and a plot stuffed full of clichés, I enjoyed this new interpretation of Robert E. Howard’s sword-wielding warrior, though I was left rather unsatisfied by the whole experience.

The first twenty minutes or so, showcasing Conan’s “he was born on the battlefield” bloody entry into the violent world of Hyboria, and his life as a young Cimmerian, feature the closest thing the film comes to actual character development.

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Devil’s DVD Disappointment: Super 8

J.J. Abrams’ and Steven Spielberg’s (and yes, they do warrant a co-credit) Super 8 is a movie with so much potential to be fun, exciting, and vastly entertaining, but is unfortunately so self-conscious in its attempt to be E.T. 2 that the makers end up distracting, and detracting, from the story, leaving the audience holding the sad and rather flaccid bag.

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Devil’s DVD Disappointment: The Change-Up

Finally caught up with The Change-Up, while up in the…something that rhymes with up. Director David Dobkin developed, directed, and distributed (that last one is likely untrue, I just wanted the alliteration) the film, with stars Jason Bateman, Ryan Reynolds, and Leslie Mann. How does The Change-Up measure up? Read the rest of this entry

Devil’s DVD Disappointment: Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides

Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides, fails to sail into new territory as it simply treads the water of the previous installments. Johnny Depp’s Jack Sparrow was initially rivaled by Captain Barbossa the undead pirate, then came Davy Jones the undead pirate, and now we have Captain Blackbeard the (yeah, you guessed it) undead pirate. With so many undead menaces lurking around, is there a chance that the fourth go around has breathed new life into the franchise? Read the rest of this entry

Devil’s DVD Disappointment: Green Lantern

No film is perfect and even the really good ones are missing something. Green Lantern is missing quite a few things, which in the end are really the factors that keep it from being an interstellar hit. The one truly unforgivable thing is there was no rendition of (and there are quite a few to choose from) “You Light Up My Life”. Read the rest of this entry

Devil’s DVD Disappointment: Transformers: Dark of the Moon

To say the hype and expectations for the third movie in the Transformers movie series were greater than the previous installment would be an understatement. After disappointing reactions from Revenge of the Fallen, even Michael Bay himself acknowledged that he was going to do what he can to make Dark of the Moon superior to its predecessor.

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Devil’s DVD Disappointment: Priest

Looking at the cast list for Priest you start to notice a trend. The main character is called “Priest”, the villain “Black Hat”, and there are also characters called “Priestess” and “Salesman”. They all sound like generic background extras from other films, this should give you some insight on how this film turned out.

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Devil’s DVD Disappointment: Your Highness

Every now and then, I am pleasantly surprised at the movies. And, every now and then, I am devastatingly disappointed at the movies. I know I am biased to stoner movies and silly comedies. I really wanted to like this movie. I am a big fan of everyone involved in this. On paper and in the trailers for Your Highness, the movie looked funny and, you know, good. But, once again, Hollywood does the “let’s put the best parts in the trailer” move and they got me. With Your Highness, I was shocked and awed by how awfully terrible this movie is. Your Highness is 2011’s worst movie by a mile.

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Devil’s DVD Disappointment: Limitless

Even a film like Limitless has its limitations. It tries to deny them, overlook them, and even, at times incorporate them, but they are there. Read the rest of this entry

Devil’s DVD Disappointment: Unknown

From viewing of the trailer for Liam Neeson’s new movie Unknown one can’t help but be reminded of his 2008 action flick Taken. Other than a few short scenes and Neeson himself, comparisons stop there. After viewing the movie and thinking back to the trailers, I have to say this was very misleading and the makers of Unknown tried to ride the success of Taken.

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Devil’s DVD Disappointment: (English Haiku Review) Drive Angry

Supernatural

Satanists, punching, driving

Add up to nothing

Devil’s DVD Disappointment: Green Hornet

Green Hornet, written by the titular character himself Seth Rogen and partner Evan Goldberg, tells the story of socialite Britt Reid and his friend Kato, and their secret war on crime. After a drunken encounter with a group of muggers, the liquid courage quickly becomes something resembling real courage, and the Green Hornet is born. Read the rest of this entry

Devil’s DVD Disappointment: Little Fockers

Returning for another go-around are the Fockers and the Byrnes in Little Fockers. Yes they are back. Director Paul Weitz takes over for Jay Roach and decides to bring the families back for another installment of films that brought us 2000’s Meet The Parents and 2004’s Meet The Fockers.

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Devil’s DVD Disappointment: Skyline

To make a movie you need a script, actors, a director and at least one camera. In order to make a good movie, you need a good script, a good director and at least one good actor. I don’t think budget has anything to do with it. You can make a movie with your iPhone and if it’s a good movie, it’s a good movie. Pretty simple concept. Read the rest of this entry

Devil’s DVD Disappointment: The Tourist

Sharing the screen for the first time is mega blockbuster actors Johnny Depp and Angelina Jolie. With two major draws like that the movie can’t miss….right?! Past films have shown us that there are hits and misses for this recipe. For every Mr. & Mrs. Smith there is a Gigli or even an Australia.

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Devil’s DVD Disappointment: Morning Glory

Closing out our actor spotlight of Harrison Ford, I was able to catch his latest but  far from greatest new release of Morning Glory. Director Roger Mitchell (Notting Hill, Changing Lanes) brings us the latest rom-com type movie. Taking a bit of 1987’s Broadcast News then throwing in some different aspects Mitchell shows us the life of a workaholic television show producer.

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Devil’s DVD Disappointment: Love and Other Drugs

My dad worked in a hospital lab when I was growing up, and I distinctly remember a point sometime in the early 90s when suddenly our house became flooded with pens, notepads, coffee mugs, what have you, all emblazoned with drug names and drug company logos. I remember being weirdly fascinated by all the strange, long chemical names (usually containing more “z”s than I thought possible for any word in the English language) and their zippier nicknames, wondering what all these drugs really did and, more importantly, where all these free office supplies came from. And now, twenty years later, I finally have an answer: they come from a-holes. Read the rest of this entry

Devil’s DVD Disappointment: Paranormal Activity 2

For all its faults, I’m a pretty big fan of the first Paranormal Activity movie. It accomplished much with very little – having little to begin with a) forces the filmmakers to be creative while it b) forces the audience to “fill in the gaps” with their own thoughts and imagination, thereby making the terror that much more horrific – nothing that any filmmaker or effects house on Earth can throw on the screen will ever be as frightening as the things you can see in your head. In Paranormal Activity 2, Director Tod ‘Kip’ Williams (former indie-darling director of festival hits The Adventures of Sebastian Cole and The Door in the Floor) and a team of writers are smart enough keep the premise same enough to be recognizable (Blair Witch 2, anyone?) while, knowing they had a guaranteed audience and hit on their hands, aiming for more ambitious targets. Unfortunately, it’s a bit of a miss, and the end result, while not a bad film, is certainly not as good as the original. Read the rest of this entry

Devil’s DVD Disappointment: Monsters

Monsters is an indie science fiction movie that follows a photographer as he tries to get his boss’s daughter through northern Mexico to safety across the border to the US. They’re both stranded behind the “infected zone”. It’s a few years into the future and most of Mexico has become a dangerous place. More so than usual. A space probe sent to investigate signs of alien life in our solar system crash-landed in Mexico. Soon after the probe crashes back onto Earth, and alien creatures start to literally sprouted up from the ground and now most of Mexico is quarantined. Both American and Mexican military forces have gone into the infected zone and never returned. So, now it’s off-limits to everybody. And, when the story begins, 48 hours from being bombed into oblivion. Fire is the only thing that can stop these alien creatures and the infected zone from spreading.

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Devil’s DVD Disappointment: Saw 3D

Another Halloween, another Saw. They say it’s the last but who knows. This time around we get 3D, hence the title Saw 3D. Personally I dislike the current 3D phase Hollywood seems to be pushing. In this economy I don’t feel the need to add a few extra dollars to my movie ticket price for something that half way through you forget the 3D factor.

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Devil’s DVD Disappointment: Piranha

Gives catch and release a whole new meaning.

Let’s face it: Piranha is not going to win any Oscars.  It won’t make anyone’s top ten list and will probably be forgotten in a couple months (but will resurrect itself in the form of a sequel if one can believe the reports).  It is a movie of the moment, an over-the-top sidestep from the stresses of reality, and a reason to grab the person next to you and throw your popcorn in the air in fright.  It is schlocky horror meant to entertain as much as scare; but is this updated throwback too late? Read the rest of this entry

Devil’s DVD Disappointment: Resident Evil: Afterlife

Primarily, and most importantly, this latest installment in the Resident Evil series is worse than watching The Biggest Loser on one of their 100 degree, summer days. I’d sooner drink the pan drippings from my Foreman grill than watch this…thing again; an act which is undoubtedly less healthy physically, but will help me to retain more brain cells. Just a mind numbing, miserable excuse of a project. Read the rest of this entry

Devil’s DVD Disappointment: Salt

What happens when a CIA officer (Angelina Jolie) is revealed to be a deep cover double agent? One long chase scene involving some incredible over the top action sequences and clever storytelling.

Angelina Jolie heads up a great ensemble cast of some very talented actors in this thriller. Jolie plays Evelyn Salt. A seemingly loyal and patriotic CIA spy. We first meet her as she’s being rescued from North Korea by her loving husband (August Diehl) and CIA chief (Liev Schreiber). Back in the States after her rescue, Agent Salt finds herself interrogating a Russian defector who asks to be interviewed by the CIA. The defector talks. Too much it turns out and we’re off. Read the rest of this entry

Devil’s DVD Disappointment: The Last Airbender

In order to write a fully realized review of M. Night Shyamalan’s latest  film, I would have to think very carefully about it.  I honestly do not wish to think about it at all, (uh oh…am I wearing my opinion on my sleeve again?) but I shall try my best.  Let me put on my half cocked, bush league critic’s hat for just a moment.  Ignoring all of the hypercritical, fanboyish nuances that go along with being a devotee of the television series, I’d like to talk simply about where the film went wrong. Read the rest of this entry

Devil’s DVD Disappointment: Sex and the City 2

This weekend I took one for the team and went to see Sex And The City 2. I survived. Barely. I do have an overwhelming urge to buy a lot of expensive shoes. Weird. Anyway, SATC2 is the latest Halloween movie from Rob…..Wait, that make-up wasn’t for a horror movie? Wow. Read the rest of this entry